not bad.
Didn't find it too entertaining, but it was pretty well made.
Idea: when going for the squigly look like you did in some scenes (like the shots of the boarder in the end credits), use 3+ frames with different lines instead of just alternating between 2. That way it looks like you drew him again in every frame but not like he is having an epileptic seizure.
Ok, Time for review number 2.
Adding in some sun rays and a few new frames for the fire DOES NOT make the jokes any funnier.
notes:
-The '1st grade feel' just comes off as bad flash. Not fun to look at.
-The animation is too slow, a 6 second joke takes about 20.
-The jokes are not funny, why would you spend time making a flash from a 1st grade story?? Why not write something new that doesn't have 1st grade humor?
-YOU DIDNT CHANGE THE MUSIC! you said you made the mucic a really short loop to 'cut down file size'. OBVIOUS: We would rather spend 5 seconds loading than listen to a 10 second clip repeat for 5 minutes. The sound LITERALLY annoys us, why would you put something into a flash if you know it will annoy us?? we dont want to be annoyed!
Scrap it, make something new.
Better than your emo one.
Is that the friend that stole your chick?
(note to other users: refrence to 'sad and depressed')
You have the right idea.
Your on the right track, and the action was there. In the future, you need to add in alot more frames. It make take a long time but the animation will be a hell of alot smoother.
The good news is:
You didnt use sticks.
You didnt use sprites.
There was no Numa Numa music involved.
About your 'fuck you' to the people at your school, all I can say is; School is what you make of it. keeping a bad attitude will only skew your vision and make stuff look worse than it really is.
umm hell yeah no numma numma involved :p.
Oh and i don't hate everybody in my schoolm thats just my way to tell them I love them.....well not love them...but I don't hate them...I do kinda hate the word"school" but this is getting longer and longer so i'll just shutup.
keep at it.
Keep workin, you'll get better.
I must admit though, I lauged my ass off when he caught on fire.. but only because of the bad animation.
To be serious though, I cant offer any more advice than to watch your movies 9.9x10^385 times before publishing them, there was no reason to have all those typo's and small animation bugs.
also, make a note: If the music only plays for 10 seconds before stopping and restarting, DONT put it on NG until you have either found new music, or fixed the restarting problem.
Typos were intentional. I copied the actuall story... I made the music that way because I knew people wouldn't watch it if the file size was too large.
keep at it.
Keep making flashes, everyone has to start somewhere and this is a good start. By the time you're the age of alot of NG's vets, you'll be making stuff for the front page.
Erm.
I Didnt really like this that much, but for some reason I felt the need to protect it.
Regardless of the quality of this flash, your not too bad. Keep it up and you'll keep getting better.
GAh.
Age 37, Male
Puppy Kicker
Texas
Joined on 5/25/05
Warrior Boarder 2 
The Useless MuleReUpdated 
FFVIII tribute..